12 Ways to Shoot Your Load
Is there any better feeling on earth than shooting your load? To relieve that build of is as close to heaven as one will ever get on earth, and the best part about it is that you can pretty much experience that joy in a variety of places, in a myriad of ways. So let’s take a look at the glory that is shooting your load.
In a Sock
One of the first ways one learns to shoot their load in a gym sock conveniently next to their bed. Their parents know what’s up and don’t question it (usually) but as an adult, there is no one judging your dirty laundry because you’re the one doing it. So go wild in those discarded socks that are just laying around anyway. Put them to good use!
On a Cock
For those who like to jerk off with company, there is always the option to do what you need to do and finish on the hot cock that’s next to you, in front of you - however you’re positioned when engaging in mutual masturbation.
Into a Magazine
This is a little old school given that we have the internet now and you can quickly search the porn you need within seconds. However, for the purists out there who love to gaze upon a glossy cock in between the pages of a dirty magazine, this one’s for you. It’s kind of like the type of jerking off a hipster would do because you know how much hipsters live for nostalgia.
In a Room Full of Steam
Say you have a sauna and while you’re in there trying to destress from a long day of work, you just can’t. Well, masturbating is definitely a stress reliever that rarely fails. That mixed with the soothing effects of a nice steamy room will allow you to blast off to serenity. Just don’t go too hard. You don’t want to pass out there.
Under Sheets
While a lot, and I mean a lot, of porn leads us to believe that all men jerk off in broad daylight just staring at their own dick, that’s not always the case. Jerking off beneath the covers allows for you to stay warm while doing so and once you finish, you can just use the sheet to clean up, then roll over and fall asleep.
When You’re Beat
Jerking off is kind of like the dessert of life because there is always room and time for it. Even when you’re tired as fuck!
In a Bathroom Stall
Hey, if you’re lucky enough to be in a place that has singular stalls and you need to rub one out - go for it! You ain’t hurting no one if you’re in there alone.
On a Dirty Call
Much like dirty magazines, the dirty calls have sort of become this ancient means of masturbation for many. However, something is tantalizing about only hearing the voice on the other end as that person does everything in their power to make you feel a certain type of way using only their words, and you? Only your vivid imagination and strong hands.
On a Plane
Who said the Mile-High Club was only for pairs?
Riding a Train
If your favorite mode of transportation is old-timey trains, and you have a cabin all to yourself then let the motion of tracks help guide you to completion.
In the Shower
No lotion is required when you find yourself in the shower with a raging boner that needs to be handled properly.
When There’s No Power
Not sure about you, but when there are rolling blackouts in the summer and you’re without your favorite apps and TV shows, there’s no better way to pass the time than to jerk off.
In a Sock
One of the first ways one learns to shoot their load in a gym sock conveniently next to their bed. Their parents know what’s up and don’t question it (usually) but as an adult, there is no one judging your dirty laundry because you’re the one doing it. So go wild in those discarded socks that are just laying around anyway. Put them to good use!
On a Cock
For those who like to jerk off with company, there is always the option to do what you need to do and finish on the hot cock that’s next to you, in front of you - however you’re positioned when engaging in mutual masturbation.
Into a Magazine
This is a little old school given that we have the internet now and you can quickly search the porn you need within seconds. However, for the purists out there who love to gaze upon a glossy cock in between the pages of a dirty magazine, this one’s for you. It’s kind of like the type of jerking off a hipster would do because you know how much hipsters live for nostalgia.
In a Room Full of Steam
Say you have a sauna and while you’re in there trying to destress from a long day of work, you just can’t. Well, masturbating is definitely a stress reliever that rarely fails. That mixed with the soothing effects of a nice steamy room will allow you to blast off to serenity. Just don’t go too hard. You don’t want to pass out there.
Under Sheets
While a lot, and I mean a lot, of porn leads us to believe that all men jerk off in broad daylight just staring at their own dick, that’s not always the case. Jerking off beneath the covers allows for you to stay warm while doing so and once you finish, you can just use the sheet to clean up, then roll over and fall asleep.
When You’re Beat
Jerking off is kind of like the dessert of life because there is always room and time for it. Even when you’re tired as fuck!
In a Bathroom Stall
Hey, if you’re lucky enough to be in a place that has singular stalls and you need to rub one out - go for it! You ain’t hurting no one if you’re in there alone.
On a Dirty Call
Much like dirty magazines, the dirty calls have sort of become this ancient means of masturbation for many. However, something is tantalizing about only hearing the voice on the other end as that person does everything in their power to make you feel a certain type of way using only their words, and you? Only your vivid imagination and strong hands.
On a Plane
Who said the Mile-High Club was only for pairs?
Riding a Train
If your favorite mode of transportation is old-timey trains, and you have a cabin all to yourself then let the motion of tracks help guide you to completion.
In the Shower
No lotion is required when you find yourself in the shower with a raging boner that needs to be handled properly.
When There’s No Power
Not sure about you, but when there are rolling blackouts in the summer and you’re without your favorite apps and TV shows, there’s no better way to pass the time than to jerk off.
