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As we peer through the looking glass of our own sexuality in search of answers to life’s big questions, we are instead presented with a shifting kaleidoscope of cultural stimuli of Freudian fetish origin stories. Why am I into the things I’m into? And I don’t just mean slim guys with big asses… I’m talking about the more unique nuances of a sexual identity that are particular to me. Fetishes, kinks, the short but powerful list of words that when uttered in bed will make me cum instantly… These are things that I’m talking about. We may never know what we like the weird shit we like, but there is one important categorical difference that is worth distinguishing: are you kinky or just porn-addicted?

First of all, this is a safe space and there will be no kink-shaming here. I want to preface this by saying that I’m not talking about any specific kinks here. Whether you’re into watersports, buttplay, or some shit that only gets like three results when you search for it on porn sites, that’s all fine and good. There’s nothing wrong with being kinky. But when you find yourself becoming increasingly kinky over time due to your porn consumption, that’s when we’ve got a problem.

One definition of porn-addiction is that it’s when porn interferes negatively in your life. This can manifest in many ways. Maybe you’re spending too many hours watching porn and aren’t focusing on things that should be your priorities. Maybe your lust for digital imagery has taken the driver seat over your actual human relationships. But perhaps the most seductive yet harmful effect of porn-addiction is an increasing desire for kinkier and kinkier porn.

Remember the first time you jacked off? If you had any visual stimulation, it was probably not much more than the briefs section of Sears catalogue. But as we all know, you gotta keep upping the stakes in order for the porn to hit right. The man who has a kink for humiliation goes from watching clips of dudes getting pantsed to hour-long orgy disgrace parties. Whatever your baseline fetish is, porn amplifies and distorts into until you’re watching shit you would never have dreamt you’d be into.

So what exactly is the problem? Your true kinks come from a deep psychological place, but the extreme fetishes you’ve acquired from watching porn are pleasurable precisely due to your high tolerance from porn. Walk away from jerking off for a while, and you may find your kinks become less extreme. At least until you ultimately go back for… ;)

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*** Andrew Christian Inc. does not claim rights to any images posted in this blog post. If you find your picture here and would like to have it credited or removed please email [email protected]

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