Dear Agatha,
I am absolutely mortified. Here's the situation: During the heavy days of quarantine last year, I started a job at a small startup in the San Francisco Bay Area. Naturally, we did everything fully remotely and I never met any of my coworkers in person... until recently. Well, for months there was this one woman--let's call her Suzy--who sorta became my defacto Slack chat buddy. We're seemed to get along great during Zoom meetings and shared a mutual ironic detachment toward the nature of the work itself. Well, fast forward to last weekend. Our entire small team has been fully vaccinated and our manager threw a little work better at a local bar. Perhaps it was just because I've been so socially deprived for the last year, but the get-together became abnormally lively for something office-related. She and left early to get drinks elsewhere, and well... long story short, I guess I flirted with Suzy because now she's spamming my phone with heart emojis and wants to plan our next date. Needless to say I am about as gay as they come and have zero sexual attraction to this woman. How can I let her down tactfully, knowing that I'll probably continue having daily Zoom calls with her. Or maybe it's just time to find a new job?
Sincerely,
Scott
Dear Scott,
I think we can all relate to her plight. Misread signals, unrequited love, or just falling for someone with an incompatible sexuality--these are common hazards in the world of love. Perhaps you are a bit blame for not being careful to avoid this situation. Unfortunately, as often as these things occur, these situations are reliably awkward. If you're out, then just be honest with her. Allow her to save face--you got too drunk, perhaps started behaving more flirtatiously than you intended. Feel free to accept her invitation for another meetup, but just as friends. If you two really get along so well, you'll be able to laugh this off and building a stronger relationship on top of it. Your job may got a while lot more awkward if you don't.
XOXO,
Agatha
