Article by Maya Vukovska

Let me start answering the question by asking you this: Is discussing a cheesy romance novel in a book club gay? IS eating baked shrimp cakes at a party gay? Or is friendship bracelet making gay?

Mutual masturbation is just another social activity: some people get together at some place to have some fun. Whether it’s gay, or not depends pretty much on the viewpoint.

For one, masturbation has always been a controversial topic. Sure, you’ve heard at least once in your life some of those old wives’ tales about going blind or losing your genitals if you play with yourself. Ridiculous myths about masturbation have been circulating for centuries. Even some seemingly very wise people would start public anti-masturbation campaigns in order to prevent the increase of sexual desires among adolescents. Like Dr. John Kellogg, for example, who advocated the consumption of cornflakes to put a stop to the hideous act of masturbation. But let us not get carried away with stories and fun facts, and cut to the chase.

Masturbation is not always a private show. As a spectator sport, it can be practiced in groups of two, three, and more, depending on the available space. (The interior of a sedan is therefore not recommendable for bigger parties!) With heterosexuals, male-female is considered to be a preferred combination. Many guys find it super arousing watching a woman taking satisfaction into her own hands. However, getting the pleasure of participating in someone else’s intimate experience is not exclusively female, she-male, male, hetero, bi, pan, demi, or gay thing. It is a universal thing. Watching someone else moaning and stroking themselves while you yourself are doing the same is a total turn-on. And by the way, that’s the reason why you like watching porn so much!

Here are six arguments why mutual masturbation is not (necessarily) gay.

The Hetero Perspective

“ 1. I do it.
2. I’m not gay
3. Hence, it’s not gay.”

This is the reasoning behind a guy’s opinion on mutual masturbation that I recently came upon on Yahoo! Answers. Many hetero men who have been engaged in same-sex mutual masturbation at some point in their lives like to think of it as a loophole. Especially if it happened back in the school or college days! To a young fella still in puberty, jerking off in the presence of his mates is a great way to experience sex and orgasm without doing the actual thing. If you’re like 14 or 15, you’ll be curious to compare the size and the potential of your penis not only with cock-shaped veggies but with other males.

The We-Are-All-Bi Perspective

We are all born bisexual, and over time as we grow up, we are socialized into monosexuality.
I didn’t say. My Sociology professor didn’t say it. And next-door Johnny definitely didn’t say it, either. It’s Sigmund Freud who said it. We must face the undeniable fact that every adult male has had some kind of “gay” experience in his life, mainly in puberty. Only after you try it, you’ll know for sure what you want to become when you grow up :), i.e. which direction to follow.

The Gay Perspective

While I was doing research for this article, I made an improvised survey among my gay friends and acquaintances, asking for their opinion on the subject matter. To summarize their answers, I’ll cite Timo, 36, from Paris, who said, “If I am jerking off together with a guy I know for sure is gay, and I feel attracted to him at some point, I’m not sure I’ll be able to restrict myself to jerking only, but go into action. I very much doubt he’ll push me away!” What he’s saying is: Gay, or not gay, if one is thinking about the other guy (or guys) in a sexual way, this makes the mutual masturbation a totally gay experience.

The Conservative Perspective

If it feels wrong, it probably is wrong. If you think of yourself as a strictly heterosexual male, then stay away from it because it’s kinda gay. If it wasn’t, then why keep it a secret?
All in all, you are very lucky you are not in 17th-century Connecticut - you could be sentenced to death penalty for masturbating.

The Progressive Perspective

People should be encouraged to masturbate - either in private or in groups. This will detract them from engaging in risky sexual behaviors that could end in STDs. They propagandize it in U.K. schools already, and the Queen does not object.

The Animalistic Perspective

Mutual masturbation is not gay. It’s mammalian. Animals like monkeys, moose, and squirrels have been documented masturbating together. Some of them are even using sticks to enhance pleasure. Anybody wants to add anything, please raise your hand. No? I thought so.