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Before ya’ll get your pitchforks, let me preface this by saying that I am absolutely here for mainstream straight acceptance of gay culture. I love intersectionality, and anyone who wants to respectfully visit a gay bar should be absolutely welcome. That being said, there’s something that needs to be addressed. Boys, what do we do about straight women in gay bars?

I don’t think it’s too controversial to say that gay bars are primarily a place for gay people in gay garb to indulge in the finer points of gay culture, whilst surrounded by gay decorum and sipping gay drinks. In theory, this should be the description of most gay bars. In practice though, it seems like more and more gay bars are becoming saturated with roving bands of bachelorette parties, cackling, puking, and otherwise disrupting the delicate balance of homo-eroticism.

We’ve written in the past about etiquette for straight guys at gay bars, but it’s a little different for women. Some straight women attend gay bars so they can enjoy an environment where they won’t be hounded by every straight man in sight. Straight women also can enjoy some camaraderie with gays regarding their mutual admiration for the male form, but there remains a line the sand. Ladies, don't bring in six of your gal pals and ruin the drag show by constantly shrieking “Yaaaaaasss queen, slay!!!” Please Becky, all the gays in the room are embarrassed for you.

The issue comes down to respect. We love partying with you, straight ladies, but just be chill, okay? Don’t treat us like lap dogs. Stop trying to set us up with your friends, and no you cannot grope us. Remember that this is a temple dedicated to sacred homo-eroticism, not simply an attraction towards men.

Gays bars are among the most welcoming establishments in the world, and I think we all want to keep it that way. But for non-gays, just remember that we’re welcoming you into our home--our very own dojo. We want you break it down on the dancefloor and enjoy the gogo boys, but we don’t want you to fetishize our culture. Come on in and play, just don’t do anything we wouldn’t. ;)

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