A Guide to Politely Rejecting Guys That Cruise You
By James of Designing Life
Let's face it. America has a terrible cruising and sex culture. That's because we don't have enough sex clubs or cruise parties to have a culture that revolves around it. Europe has created etiquette on how to cruise and even how to politely reject a guy you're not interested in that we can all learn from. Therefore, I will share some of these tips so you can avoid that awkward moment next time someone flirts with you.
Why Bother Sharing These Tips?
Big cities across the USA have gay cruise bars, and when I visit, I see some incredibly embarrassing behavior—everything from throwing a hissy fit to literally running away at full speed from someone who attempted to cruise you. Don't do that. You just look ridiculous, unsophisticated, and like "a virgin who can't drive." Yes, that is a Clueless quote.
So what do you do instead? Here are a couple of tips you should always keep in mind.
No Always Means No
It doesn't matter if someone is trying to give you a million bucks, a root canal, a new t-shirt, or a blow job. If you don't want it, no will always mean no. It does not mean "maybe later" or "perhaps, but not really." It will always mean no, "periodt." So if you verbalize no, or someone says no to you, it's time to move on. Don't personalize it. This should not be offensive. Do not shout "NOOOO!!!!" A simple, nice, monotone "No" or "No, thank you" should suffice. It's all about fun. So let's be polite and keep the good energy flowing.
Move Away
Some guys are bold, and instead of approaching you, they'll reach out to grab you in one way or another. A simple and polite way to reject them is to simply dodge their hand movement.
What I mean is, if someone reaches to touch your chest at a cruise club and you are not okay with it, just shift away without making a scene and perhaps shake your head to make it clear you're not interested.
Politely Move Their Hand Away
Perhaps you forgot to shift away to let them know you're not interested and have allowed them to touch you, or maybe you changed your mind after the fact; how do you politely reject someone in this case?
Swipe their hand away with a finger or two, and pretend you are swiping something on your smartphone. This should not be forceful, but it tells them you don't want their hand on you.
If you're on the other side of this and get rejected like this, don't take it personally. You can't be everyone's type. This is not your chance to be "fierce" or "savage." Simply turn around, acknowledge them with a smile, and move on.
It's important to remember that it's not usually about you, and since you can't read people's minds, it's better to accept it and find someone who will say "yes to you. After all, many men will say yes.
Embrace Your Sexuality
The truth is we live in a country (USA) that is built on Puritanism or, as I like to call it, "prudism." So, while the Europeans embrace nudity and sex as a natural way of life, we seem to hide and shame ourselves into believing we are not supposed to have sex. So, these skills, the skills to play and reject or accept guys politely and in a fun way, would happen naturally if we had more sex clubs or sex party venues. But since we don't, all we can do is share the knowledge and hope it catches on.
Most Importantly, Enjoy!
So, while this article was more about rejecting and how to do so politely, remember to have fun, bring a good vibe to the cruise venue you're playing in, and enjoy. After all, sex should be fun.