Ask Agatha: Should I Embrace My Daddy Issues?
Darling Agatha,
Every time I find myself crushing, lusting, or flat-out simping… it’s always for a man with big “father figure” energy. You know the type. Calm voice. Confident. Strong forearms. A wallet that screams “I’ve been filing taxes since before you were born.”
Anyway... here’s the tea, Auntie A: I know I’ve got daddy issues. But is it really a problem if I’m self-aware and still enjoying the view? Should I unpack this with a therapist or just lean into the fantasy and ride it ‘til the wheels fall off?
Signed,
Deeply (And I Do Mean Deeply) Into Daddies
Dear Daddy Lover,
Sweetheart, let me be perfectly clear—self-awareness is sexy. The fact that you’re clocking your own patterns? That’s already more growth than half the circuit party crowd.
Let’s talk about the concept of daddy issues. At its core, it’s not about actual age—it’s about craving that emotional security, validation, or protection you didn’t always get when you were growing up. And honey, that’s not freaky. That’s just human. Maybe you want a man who makes you feel safe. Maybe you want one who tells you when to bend over and be a good boy. Both can exist. Same man, different lighting.
But here’s the gag: when your daddy desire is driven by a hole in your heart (and not just the one in your jock), it might be time to pull out your emotional toolbelt and do a little inner renovation. Therapy? Helpful. Talking to your chosen family? Even better. Talking to me while tipsy on espresso martinis? Therapeutic in its own way.
Here’s what I don’t want for you, babe: chasing unavailable men just because the rejection feels familiar. Settling for control because you mistake it for care. Saying “yes” to crumbs when what you really want is a three-course meal with dessert and a cheeky espresso.
But also… sometimes daddy issues come with a six-pack and a BMW. So if you’re emotionally healthy and just happen to like a man who opens your car door and your legs, then I say bless it.
Your fantasy is fine. Just don’t let it become a substitute for the love, stability, or healing you actually need. And remember—a real daddy listens, respects, and calls you “good boy” only when you want him to.
XOXO,
Agatha
