Is age really just a number? Or is it actually an extremely important number that can determine your level of success in the dating world? We like to believe that the former is true, but in fact, recent surveys from AARP have shown that the majority of gay men over 45 are single. And this figure differs starkly from hetero men and people of other sexualites in the same demographic. So does this mean we really are ageist when it comes to dating?
Letโs start with the obvious elephant in the room. Sure, certain facets of gay culture place a ton of emphasis on youth, with GRINDR perhaps being the worst perpetrator. Iโm sure weโve all heard the comical axiom of, โthereโs two ages for gay men: 29 and old.โ A lot of guys on GRINDR will only be interested in a fling if youโre still carrying that halcyon twinkle of youthful naivety in your eye.
It may just be time to accept that GRINDR is largely a young manโs game, but thereโs not necessarily anything wrong with that. Every app has its own culture, and weโre beginning to see more diverse apps, like Scruff, that seem to cater to men of all ages.
So while itโs true that a lot gays worship at the base of the Fountain of Youth, there are arguably an equal number who downright fetish older guys. Daddies, as theyโre often lovingly referred to, are men who are hot exactly for the reasons which, to others, are a turn-off. Maturity, experience, wisdom, and a grizzled manly bod are hot to some, but anathema to others. It all comes down to a matter of taste.
As time goes by, weโre beginning to see more stodgy taboos disappear, and it seems like ageism in dating is headed in that direction as well. Not pursuing a potential partner because heโs too old (or even too young) is simply an outmoded way of thinking. Love doesnโt have an age limit. If you two of you are compatible, then who cares what your ages are? Remember that time heals all things, especially scrappy young dudes who think theyโre too good to date older guys. ;)
