Is Your Penis "Normal"? Breaking Down the Different Types and Shapes of Cock

Article by Maya Vukovska

Many men, gay and straight, tend to think of their penises as separate living and breathing creatures - they give them names and talk to them when they need encouragement or solace. That’s because they treat the penis as a faithful buddy - one they are going to be stuck with for the rest of their lives. And like any other close friend you have, you know its weaknesses and its strengths, and you can’t keep but worry if it looks good and presents itself in the best possible light when it comes to… you know… action. Due to unhealthy sociocultural influences, an increasing number of men feel dissatisfied with their “buddies” and are willing to undergo cosmetic procedures to enhance their size or improve their looks. Let’s take porn for example. It creates a conception of dick size and form (and of sex in general) that is pretty much unrealistic, ergo wrong. Expecting our bodies and body parts to look like the ones in porn videos or on Snapchat pics from potential lovers, is like expecting our baking skills to be the same as Martha Stewart’s! As far as you can pee and fuck with it, there’s nothing wrong with your one-eyed buddy. Even with that in mind, however, some gay men will still reject a sexual partner because of the size of their dick. And it’s not me who’s saying this. A couple of years ago, research was carried out by GMFA (the Gay Men’s Health Charity) showed that a shocking 38% of the surveyed subjects claimed that their penis size caused them anxiety, and 16% confessed they had received rude and derogatory comments about their sex organs. But, you know, everybody who’s saying “You are not fucking me with that thing, aren’t you!” is a bully, and doesn’t deserve even an inch of your “thing”. So, put your dick away, and move forward. Hairy, smooth, veiny, freckled, curved downward, C-shaped, straight… All in all, penises come into 20 different categories based on shape and size. Oh, yes, and color. It’s a curious fact that the color of the penis can considerably differ from that of the person it’s attached to. Sex hormones regulate the cells responsible for pigmentation, so it’s the rising testosterone levels that can make skin dark. This means that a dark-skinned dick on a white-skinned guy is not an anomaly, and you can be sure that despite its irregular pigmentation the penis works just fine. Instead of feeling embarrassed about your penis curving upward like a banana when erect, you should rejoice. This curve gives an advantage because it makes it easier to stimulate the prostate. A “banana” turned downward is also a beneficial instrument because with it one can reach the hot spot along the front wall of the rectum. You just have to flip your partner around to get closer to this spot. A penis pointing left or right is a great tool for doing the T-bone position. The top is on his side with the curve pointing to the ceiling (or the sky, depending on the setting), and the bottom lies on his back in a T angle, puts his legs over the top’s hip, and is ready for anal. The “hammer” penis, or the one with a large head and a narrow base, is, as its name suggests, excellent for nailing. The extra large tip stimulates the rectal walls like no sex toy could ever. The penis with a bigger base and a narrow head comes with great perks, too. The smaller tip makes the anal penetration easier and less painful, but once it’s inside, the large base comes in handy by providing extra stimuli. As regards circumcised and uncircumcised penises, the opinions have always been quite polarized. Outside the United States, especially in Europe, the cut dicks are perceived as “unnatural”, and even inferior to the uncut ones. But in many cultures, the opposite attitude is king. The bottomline is that, just like people, dicks come in all sizes, shapes, and skin tones, and there’s nothing wrong with your dick being cut or uncut, crooked to the left or to the right, too short or too big. It’s just a penis and it’s yours. So own it.