Dear Agatha,
I fear that I may be sexually incompatible with my boyfriend. When we go on dates, we get along swimmingly. The conversation flows naturally, we have common interests, and I definitely am physically attracted to him. The problem is in the bedroom. The first time we had sex, it was... good albeit a bit awkward. However, now every time we get undressed in bed, all he wants to do is jerk off together! Like, not even really touching each other much. Just the two of us, sitting there, mutually masturbating. Don't get me wrong, I definitely enjoy this, but it can't be my only form of sex. Is my only choice to break up?
Sincerely,
Keith
Dear Keith,
Sexual incompatibility is a perfectly valid reason to end a relationship. If for whatever reason mutual masturbation is his only sexual love language, then there's really not much you can. The key is going to be having a frank conversation, ideally with your clothes still on. You love him and being together, but ultimately you're unsatisfied on a physical level. He'll either understand and wish you well, or meet you halfway. Try jerking each other's dicks and see if that becomes too intimate with him. If so, his problem may not be with kink but his emotions. A kind, compassionate talk is the only way to settle this.
XOXO,
Agatha
