The practice of accepting who you are gets talked about a lot in terms of gender, sexuality, and other forms of identity. But there’s another factor that doesn't get talked about much but is uncontrollable by an individual, much like there’s other ones. A person's kinks and fetishes emerge as immutable forces in their sexuality, and everyone has different ones. Granted, some kinks are far less vanilla--let’s say--than others, but it’s important to recognize that kink-shaming is just another no-no to be done away with as we progress as society. Sexuality should be expressed, not repressed. Repression can manifest in harmful ways for the individual and others. So if you’ve got a kink that you think is weird or gross, but really really can't stop thinking about, then you owe to yourself to try it out. The wise gay elders will bestow this secret when asked. It takes a lifetime of experience to develop the practice of truly expressing your sexuality with total integrity. With each meaningful sexual encounter, listen to what your mind, heart, and cock are guiding you toward. Pay attention to which particular orgasms produce the most copious spurts of cum; how and with whom did it occur? Being true to your kinks is the only way to have the best sex possible. To be certain, there are limits. Some kinks are more dangerous and outlandish than others and will require caution, tact, or degrees of fantasy to be practical. At the extreme, some kinks are necessarily illegal or inherently violent. If life has dealt you a hand like this, you have to be honest with yourself about restraint and finding ways to achieve sexual gratification in a way that is totally healthy for everyone involved. A kink cannot be chased at the cost of all other things. Acknowledge that there is a fetish there, but it doesn’t make you a good or bad person. It’s also important to realize that, odds are, your fetish is not nearly as weird as you think it is. The internet has allowed like-minded fetishists of staggeringly obscurity to convene and celebrate their shared sliver of sexuality. Statistically speaking, it’s basically impossible that you’re the only one with your particular fetish. There’s bound to be other people who think the exact same weird freaky shit is hot as you do. So next time you’re feeling alone, indulge in your kink and know that it’s something that unifies you, not alienates you.
August 22, 2018 — Andrew Christian