Dear Agatha,
Last month, I met a guy on a dating app, and it was one of those rare encounters where he and I hit it off right away. We met up, and I experienced what was, without a doubt, the most intense and passionate sex of my life. His cock is perfect: at least nine inches and incredibly girthy. He knows exactly how to use it. I could go on forever. Sex isn't the problem here. The problem is that when he and I go out to dinner, coffee, or even order take-out, he is vulgar to the wait staff. He snaps his fingers at them, belittles them, and once, he even stiffed a waiter because she forgot to bring something he ordered. (I was sure to leave a cash tip before we left…I couldn't stand it!)
The sex continues to be the best I've ever had. Still, I can't believe how abrasive he is to customer service employees. I've gotten used to having the best sex of my life, but how can I date someone if our dates end up awkward due to his behavior?
Sincerely,
Joe
Dear Joe,
This is a miserable situation. We've all had to endure that awkward experience where someone in our party was being a total bitch to the service staff. It's uncomfortable for everyone involved. People show who they are when interacting with customer service workers. Let's face it, some terrible waiters are out there…but most of them work hard and don't deserve this treatment. If this guy has done this multiple times, it's probably habitual behavior, and he has done this for a long time.
You should sit him down and discuss this openly, honestly. Ask him if he notices how he talks to servers when you're out. Seek to understand the why of it all. Then be sure to explain how it makes you feel when he treats people like this. Share your feelings openly and honestly. You also need to pay close attention to his reaction. It might be worth sticking around if he embraces your feedback and works to correct his behavior.
If he doesn't improve his behavior, you need to ask yourself: is this who you want to associate with? Believe me, I understand the need for hot, amazing sex! But in the end, if he's rude to undeserving strangers, do you really want to surround yourself with that type of energy?
Be honest with yourself and choose wisely!
XOXO,
Agatha
