Article written by Kendra Beltran

Every gay man has that one best gal pal--their mate with a vajayjay. The girl they will love for life but will never get down and dirty with. The woman in their life affectionately known as their "hag." Just what makes a hag the best friend a guy could ask for though? Well, you know you and your hag were meant to be if they check each and every one of the following boxes.

1. She's #1 on Speed Dial

Before your mother, your lover, and Postmates, she is the first person on your speed dial for any and all of your needs. Whether it's boy drama with a capital D or just a minor inconvenience like where you put that one top that goes with that one pair of jeans. You do not even have to say more because she already knows what top and knows exactly where it is even though she has not been over since you rearranged your closet last week. Girl. Knows. That is because even when she is not around you are on video chat like 24/7. Inseparable.

2. She Elevates You

Friends that leave you to wither away in a bad place are not worthy of your time. Which is why you could give every clock in the world to your hag. She only ever aspires to be her best self and in turn, inspires you to do the same.

3. She's Honest AF

She will tell you how stupid you're being in a relationship without you even having to ask. While some see that as a problem, it is a true gift. You don't want to have people in your life who do not have your best interest in mind. She tells it like it is and you tell her right back. There is nothing in your life you would not trust her opinion on because she has proven time and time again to be as honest as someone under oath.

4. Cohabitation Rules

You two may not share a lease officially because grown folks need their own space, but it sure seems like you do. Either she's always at your place or you are always at hers. Your neighbors have even wondered if your place is a two-bedroom because you two are always coming in and out of your places hand in hand gabbing and laughing as great roommates do. You also have each other's backs when it comes to your spaces. Which means you both help with the housework no matter whose place you're at, and you even have a key to one another's place because like, why would not you?

5. Dating Advice On Lock

You both deal with the trials and tribulations known as dating men so she knows a thing or two about a thing or two and is always willing to share her two cents on the matter. Just like you are willing to shell out your wisdom to her. With nothing but respect for one another's dick game, you never even think of asking anyone else when it comes to this department.

6. She's Woke

Your hag is not just hanging out with you because of some idea in her head about how crazy and wild the life of a gay man is. She's not your right-hand woman for some bullshit stereotypical reason. She's with you because she loves you. She also has mad respect for what you and the rest of the LGBTQ+ community go through on a regular basis. When there's a march or a rally, she is right by your side with her sign in hand fighting for equal rights.

June 13, 2019 — Andrew Christian
Tags: Listicles