We'd Risk It All to Fuck These Famous Monsters
Article written by Kendra Beltran
It is hard to explain why we have no real issue with being sexually attracted to vampires, werewolves, and ghosts. I guess if Adam Driver could have a fandom - anything is possible, right? Nevertheless, these spooky season baes have been portrayed in pop culture by a number of people so damn hot that weโve often considered the idea of fucking them. I mean, you only live once, why not mount a guy who may or may not turn into a rabid werewolf during a full moon? Or a guy who could potentially bite you and make you immortal? With all of that said, weโre looking at the hottest monsters that weโd risk our lives to fuck in the dead of night.
Edward Cullen, Twilight
Letโs start with a little sparkle, shall we? Edward Cullen was the dreamboat of the โ00s and well, he was a vampire. A glittery, emo, adult pretending to be in high school (who would want to go back?) to woo an even more emo girl. While the plot was as comical as the final on-screen product, that didnโt stop you then and it doesnโt stop you now from wanting a piece of that shiny vampireโs ass.
Lestat de Lioncourt, Interview with a Vampire
For people of a particular age, โInterview with a Vampireโ was it when you were growing up. Itโs even likely that you started to feel things when Tom Cruiseโs Lestat de Lioncourt appeared on screen the first time. We get it. Look at him. Remember, this was before he went and acted a fool on Oprahโs couch. This was when anyone Cruise warranted your hormones and attention, especially when it was a hot ass bloodsucker.
R, Warm Bodies
We know we said this was all about the sex, but we couldnโt help but fall dead over heels for the romantic zombie in โWarm Bodies.โ
Eric Northman, True Blood
Have you not laid eyes on this bloodthirsty creature played by Alexander Skarsgard? Yeah, thatโs more than enough reason to give in to whatever he wants you to do.
Imhotep, The Mummy
He may be a mummy but weโd do anything to call his daddy!
Blade, Blade
Weโd be stupid not to want to fuck the vampire/human hybrid that was a legit superhero.
Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice
Heโs a bad boy you could never take home to mom, but that doesnโt mean you wouldnโt want to scream his name more than three times in a night.
Scott Howard, Teen Wolf
Wait, what? Yes, weโve mentioned the most recent โTeen Wolfโ but we had to shout out the boy next door wolf that first stole hearts thanks to Michael J. Fox in the โ80s.
Angel & Spike, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Unlike Buffy, we are not about to choose between these hot ass undead men. Weโd take them separately but hell, who are we kidding? A threesome with a mere mortal tossed in the mix, now thatโs hot.
Oz, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
We love a pint-sized werewolf.
Herman Munster, The Munsters
Imagine grabbing those bolts on the side of his neck while he gave you the best fuck of your lifeโฆ
The Entire Vampire Diaries Universe
Julie Plec knew what she was doing when she brought โThe Vampire Diariesโ to life on The CW. It was basically picking up where โBuffyโ left off, but increasing the sex appeal and making the vampires the center of the universe. In this world, there is no shortage of hot vampires youโd want to fuck for eternity - which you could if you got bit! From the always dueling Salvatore brothers to the Mikaelsons led by the werewolf/vampire hybrid Klaus, the possibilities for mythological creature dick is endless.
The Countess, American Horror Story: Hotel
Here we have a bonus because there is no one on earth with hormones that could walk away not wanting to fuck Lady Gagaโs Countess after the first episode of โAmerican Horror Story: Hotel.โ She made blood and sex look hotter than a Palm Springs pool party in the middle of July.